She gave so much

Many people believe that animals have a healing touch. Perhaps you have heard of places in America where disabled children go to swim with dolphins and they are changed. Or you know of people who use their horses for therapy. There are even dogs who go to visit sick people in hospital because it is known that owning an stroking an animal is good for your mental health. The programme is called PAT - Pets As Therapy

Well, in her own small way, Tilly the Patchwork Dog did her bit for therapy. I have been seeing an autistic teenaged boy for some months to help him overcome his severe dog phobia. I had been using Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). He had progressed brilliantly and so we decided that we needed to step up a gear with some managed desensitisation.

So one hot afternoon in the summer we brought Tilly to meet him. Soppy, quiet old Tilly mooched around a bit and eventually flopped down in the sunshine. And after a while my brave client came and sat with us. He managed to stroke my beautiful, gentle girl and she let him get used to her without pushing him too far. I nearly cried, it was amazing. This boy really wanted to see her and meet her and stroke her, he was fascinated.

We hoped she would be well enough to visit him again but sadly it was not meant to be. I am just so grateful to her to remember that one of the last things she achieved in her life was to help a boy who wasn't able to help himself. Animals are so trusting and gentle and giving.

When I think how much Tilly gave us in her short life I am truly humbled. Such a special dog.

Bereavement

On 29 December 2008 I wrote,

"You know that your pet is going to die before you do. You absolutely know it but to be faced with it suddenly was not funny. I really didn't think she was coming home again. And every moment with her now is a bonus, every walk is precious."

And yes it was precious, but my beautiful Patchwork Dog has gone now. A week ago we went for a walk in the morning, had our breakfast together and mooched about the house all day. At tea time, she was poorly, not eating - unheard of! Then 2 trips to the vet, a night sat up with her and she was gone. My beautiful princess dog had had to go, the old clothes not working any more, at the end of their given life.

It is VERY VERY hard. We had 20 months of her, when she had been kept alive with the skill of the vets and her medications. She'd been slowing down over the last 6 months though, almost imperceptibly winding down slowly.

Personally I have never known grief quite like this. I am a big dog lover but have never been through this before and it has thrown me. In a post a long time ago, when we knew she was sick, I promised to tell the story of the patchwork dog and me. Not right now, it is too sad but one day. In the mean time, if you want more of the story, if you click on the post labels for Dogs to the Left of the page you'll get a bit more about my dog and me, and a picture of two.

RIP Tilly 17 June 1998 to 30 September 2010.

I wonder what she was doing on Millenium Eve....?

Is it stress or too much to do?

Sometimes there really is too much to do in life. Which is why I am sitting here blogging about it, because I am bored with working and tidying and decided to write about it whilst putting my laptop back in my study.

Not only do I have a full-on day helping people, I then have to pick up a tired and often grumpy 3 year old from nursery. On arrival at home I have to coax him out of the car (safely) and get him into the house (safely) at which point I then have to deal with a bouncing and starving labrador. Trying to feed both 3 year old and dog without one of them imploding is a task in itself.

(Oh and add in the clearing up of dog sick at least once a week, in fact twice today)

After tea time, getting an even more tired small person bathed, teeth-brushed, toileted and into bed without ructions provides yet more fun and games.

So by 7.30 I am ready to start the rest of the day's work. Cooking a meal, clearing up, washing up, opening the post, checking emails, a bit of book-keeping, filing from the day's work and preparation for the next. Then after all that's done there is washing and house cleaning to do.

Sometimes I do wonder where I'm going wrong...

Snowy about the ears

I couldn't resist posting this pic of the Patchwork dog. She has been bouncing around like a spring puppy and has obviously been expensively faking it! Grrr!

Labrador

A very quick post today. The Patchwork Dog has improved it seems. The vet nurse phoned me last night to tell me that her (the dog's!) bloods were improved. She didn't say how much. So the vet is speaking to the specialist (the expensive specialist) to agree a treatment plan. So definately going in the right direction. I thought she seemed better and more lively. And the fur on her belly is starting to grow back too, in wispy little bits - aah!

Ignore the Doom-Mongerers!

My accountant has been muttering darkly about 2009 since November last year. He has been wishing it were over already, wishing it was over before it was begun - doom, gloom, recession blah blah. But I am simply not listening, despite it being poor grammar to begin a sentence with a conjunction! We can create a lot of our own reality and if I think it's going to be a bad year then I fully expect it will be. But if I continue to look for the good times then I am more likely to see the good times when they happen, attract more good times in the future AND have a better year anyway just because I have a more optimistic outlook!

The year has started well for me and I am happily practising from my new rooms. I am continuing to attract clients and I am helping them to enjoy their lives. How could I ask for more?!

An update on the Patchwork Dog... she went for blood tests this morning and I will find out how they are later in the week. She is certainly a lively girl at the moment, was bouncing 2 feet in the air this morning off all 4 paws and she hasn't done that in years.

Dog Days

Few people ask how I am but so many people are concerned about my poorly sick dog! So given that I have published a photo of Squeaky, here is a photo of Patchwork Dog.

If you look carefully you can see her poor chilly belly, one patch on her neck, one on each foreleg and one on the left hand rear leg. She has another patch on the other side of her neck and these two I think are just starting to grow back.

Poor old girl. She goes back to the vet on Monday and we shall find out then how much she is recovering. She's so pretty and so valuable to me. The story of Patchwork Dog and me is a longer one and I will save it for another time.

It's another "me" post today and I hope you are still following while I take a break from philosophy and therapy. Having said that...

A dog is amazing therapy in itself. If you are feeling low then consider getting a dog. They love you and need you every day, no matter how you look, what you are wearing or how you are feeling. Dogs don't give a damn about all your perceived failures in life. You don't live alone when you have a dog. I cannot recommend them highly enough. They help you to focus outside yourself. If you are depressed and live alone, the introspection often takes over and you can help yourself into a pit. Having an outside focus brings you away from focussing too hard on yourself. And dogs are quiet and non-judgemental. I can honestly say that I have never been into chatting too much to my dogs but many dog owners do and it probably works.

My second best breed of dog after labrador retriever (yellow is the only colour!) ? It has to be the Border Terrier. Sound, good-natured little dogs. Trainable, small and clean with loads of personality.

Lets hear it for dogs!

Success and Failure

Well it's been a funny day or two. I saw my weight loss client today. She is a funny mix of contradictions. I alsways have to aske her the same question twice in different manners because each time the answer is different. She is doing well in my view but on a scale of one to ten she only thinks her progress is a 5 out of 10. So much for my opinions then! She's happy anyhow, a BIG thing for her, because she has been very low and depressed. Before Christmas she got into a dip that I was worried might turn into a huge trough. But is hasn't. Woo Hoo!

So today, for the first time, my lady was not wearing black. I thought it a huge step forward. She had barely noticed and laughed. She also laughed at how excited I was when she told me how good she was feeling. I don't care, I love it.

So where's the bad news then? Well my stop smoking client from last week has gone to pieces according to her sister, can't even get out of the house and is smoking again. Now this is a tough one, really tough. If she can't get to see me then how can I help? I am loathe at the moment to offer to visit. I cannot be all things to everyone, yet I want to help, of course I do. I am suspecting a big guilt trip although I may be wrong. The lady is pregnant and her last baby suffered because she smoked through pregnancy. Hence coming to me to help her stop.

Now is she terrified because she has already failed and she is now putting her baby at risk? Is she worried about the baby? Is she just hormonally and emotionally pregnant? She is apparently an emotional wreck! ANd has gone back to cigarettes, back to the toxic friend that she knows and loves, who makes her feel better. And yet the cigarette friend doesn't make her feel better, no he makes her feel worse. So the family are blaming me. Oh good... It isn't cheap to give up smoking with hypnosis but you can save that money you spent in about a month with what you save on cigarettes. This lady is not well off, quite the opposite. I so want to help her but my messages go unanaswered. What can I do?

So some highs and lows today. Now it's time for another high - taking my beloved out. Going out in the week, how decadent! NO, you fools, taking the dog out for a walk! Oops, Patchwork Dog heard me from her slumber behind my chair and has leapt up with the energy of a coiled spring. Well she looked up and stretched anyway. I mustn't tease her, she is poorly sick after all...

Sick as a Dog

My dog!

My poor beautiful labrador has been really ill. In fact she still is a very poorly dog. I took her to the vets thinking she had a urine infection and the vet admitted her immediately, with severe jaundice! Several days later we were driving her down the M1 to a specialist vet hospital in Bedfordshire.

She has had loads of medication, a prescription diet and ultrasound scans etc. She has chronic liver disease! And yet we didn't even know she was ill. Her test results suggest she should be a very sick dog, yet she was bouncing around as usual.

We thought she wasn't coming home ever again. It was terrible. I had no idea what it is like to have a sick animal. She came home on Christmas Eve thank heaven and is doing ok. Not recovered, and never quite will but improving.

I am so attached to her. I don't want to think about her not being here. It's been such a shock.

You know that your pet is going to die before you do. You absolutely know it but to be faced with it suddenly was not funny. I really didn't think she was coming home again. And every moment with her now is a bonus, every walk is precious.